recovery
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Power Out
My body has been hurting so bad. My back and neck are completely locked up and the pain has been nonstop for days. And I’ve had a horrible migraine since the end of last week. Sitting, standing, lying down – nothing feels right. I try to ignore it, I try to push through, but it’s Continue reading
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Hibernate
alone, anxiety, Authenticity, autumn, body, cozy, dark, death, deep-thoughts, emotions, exhausted, existentialism, fear, feeler, feelings, FemininePower, funeral, grief, guilt, healing, health, hibernation, hurt, hurting, inner-work, lazy, life, lonely, loss, mental health, my life, night, pain, rain, recovery, relationships, relaxation, rest, self care, Self portrait, Self Reflection, sleep, Slow Down, still life, suffering, tension, tired, tiresome, wellness, worn, worried, Zen -
Carrying Ghosts
I don’t really understand what’s happening, but it feels like my symptoms are coming back. My neck and shoulders are so tense it feels like I’m carrying the weight of everything I’ve ever survived. It’s the same tension I had before I was medicated, the kind that never really leaves. I am also so incredibly Continue reading
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Bracing For Fall
When I was little, every season in Washington carried its own kind of magic. Summer was blackberry stained fingers and stubborn sunsets that lingered long after bedtime. Spring was cherry blossoms scattered across wet sidewalks, tulips rising out of soggy earth. Winter was snow on the Cascades, holiday lights against dark evergreens, breath curling white Continue reading
art, artistic, Authenticity, autumn, community, consciousness, creative-writing, death, deep-thoughts, experiences, fall, feeler, feelings, Growth, heartache, infj, inner-work, Inspiration, life, longing, Mindfulness, moments, mother, nature, pain, positive thoughts, recovery, reflection, seasons, Self Reflection, suffering, tired, whimsy, writing -
My First Week Back at Work After Surgery: A Humbling Reminder
Coming back to work after surgery felt like walking into a space I once knew but now had to relearn. I told myself I’d ease back in, be gentle with my body, honor the healing process. And I really thought I understood what that meant. But this first week? It reminded me how much I Continue reading
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Easter Thoughts from the Back Row at Benaroya
Happy Easter. I’m currently nursing a head cold and still recovering from surgery, so today looks like tissues, tea, and sweatpants. Not exactly the fresh start kind of energy Easter is known for, but it’s real. Yesterday, though, I managed to leave the house for the first time in four weeks. I went to a Continue reading
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Soft Toes & Soothing Moments: A Pedicure After the Pain
It’s been a minute since I treated myself, and today felt like the perfect time. I got a much-needed pedicure and let me just say, it felt amazing. Like, close your eyes and sigh kind of amazing. The warm water, the gentle scrubbing, the soft touch on my skin—it all felt extra special this time. Continue reading
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Submerged in Relief: My First Bath After Surgery
In the quiet of the afternoon,I sank into the water,The heat wrapping around my bodyLike a slow exhale. The tension, built up over weeks of recovery,Softened in the warmth,Muscles once stiff and soreFinally letting go. Each breath seemed to syncWith the rhythm of the water,A quiet release,A fleeting escape from discomfort. For a moment, I Continue reading
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Recovery: A Journey of Patience and Resilience
It’s been a long and challenging road, and I still have four more weeks of recovery ahead of me. Each day brings a mix of hope and frustration. I want to move forward, but my body is reminding me that I need to be patient. The restrictions placed on me are tough to live with, Continue reading
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The Weight of Healing: Reflections on Surgery and Pain
Day two, and the pain is relentless. It moves through me in waves: sharp, deep, and unforgiving. I’ve always been a side sleeper, but now my body resists every position, every shift, every attempt at comfort. My bed, once a place of rest, now feels foreign, incapable of holding me through this. So, I’ve surrendered Continue reading
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Surgery, Cysts, and Coffee
I had surgery today, and honestly, it was a lot harder than I thought it would be. I was wheeled into the OR, scared out of my mind, not really knowing what to expect, but I had an amazing medical team that made all the difference. My gynecological oncologist is the top in the area, Continue reading
The Dreamer's Pen 